RECEPTIONIST
Welcome.
VINCE
Can you tell me what's going on?
RECEPTIONIST
Yes.  I have some news for you, and it may come as a bit of a shock... You're dead.
VINCE
Dead?... Oh no.  That car accident, oh god.
RECEPTIONIST
Yeah, so you're in Limbo now.
VINCE
What's that?
RECEPTIONIST
Well, basically, Heaven is way up there, Hell is way down there.  We're here.  It's kind of like Earth, but not quite Earth.
VINCE
So that's why there were all those creatures out there, and everything was so weird...
RECEPTIONIST
Whoa, whoa, whoa.  You were outside this facility?
VINCE
Yeah, right after the accident.
RECEPTIONIST
Uhh, that wasn't supposed to happen.  You were supposed to get teleported to your nearest processing facility when you died.  Lemme check your record...
Types something into the computer
RECEPTIONIST (CONT'D)
Yeaaahh, seems there's been a, uhh, glitch.  Actually, you're not even dead.  You're just in a coma.
VINCE
Oh, thank god.
RECEPTIONIST
I'd let you, but I think he's in a meeting right now.
Rimshot
RECEPTIONIST (CONT'D)
I'm just kidding, I don't really know god.  So yeah, you're gonna get to go home.
VINCE
Nice.  But hey, can you tell me if a girl named Anna Harwell came through here?
RECEPTIONIST
Yeah, hang on.
Types
RECEPTIONIST (CONT'D)
She got here about an hour ago.
Types, and Anna appears on another monitor.
RECEPTIONIST (CONT'D)
Look there, we can even see what she's doing right now.
Visuals
RECEPTIONIST (CONT'D)
I'm sorry, but she didn't survive the accident.
VINCE
Oh no, Anna...
RECEPTIONIST
Pretty girl.  Too bad she's going to Hell.
VINCE
What?!  No!  She's a good person, that can't be right!
RECEPTIONIST
The computer doesn't lie.
VINCE
You thought I was dead when I came in here!
RECEPTIONIST
Uh, lemme check here...
Typing
RECEPTIONIST (CONT'D)
Okay, there was a glitch, she's supposed to be sent to Heaven, but right now she's on her way to Hell.
VINCE
Oh for god's SAKE!  She's gonna spend eternity in Hell because of some stupid computer glitch?!
RECEPTIONIST
What do you expect, this is a Windows machine.
Rimshot
VINCE
We can't let that happen!
RECEPTIONIST
Yeah, except ya see, here's the deal.  We'd have to straighten that out at _____.  That's where people can pass to Heaven, Hell, or, in your case, back to Earth.  She's headed there right now, and you're going there soon.  But the train only leave once every two weeks, and you just missed it.
VINCE
Two weeks?  But by the time I get there, won't it be too late?
RECEPTIONIST
Yeah, but those are the breaks.
VINCE
There's no other way to get there?
RECEPTIONIST
No other safe way.  Those creatures you saw outside came up from Hell.  They're always prowling around up here, and if they catch you, they'll bring you back down to Hell and feast on your guts forever.  They kind of remind me of my mother-in-law.
Rimshot
VINCE
I have to do something!
RECEPTIONIST
The only thing we can do is put you in a room till the train comes back.
VINCE
No, I can't let Anna go to Hell!
RECEPTIONIST
Yeah you can.  By the way, we're not giving you options here.  Can't let you outside, too dangerous, period.
VINCE
No!
RECEPTIONIST
Get him out of here, guys.
VINCE
No, I can't let this happen!
He is carried away